I would class myself as a writer of sorts now. I blog almost daily about a wide variety of subjects and although I do have the occasional writer’s block or a few days ‘off’, I generally find it very easy and quite therapeutic to put my life into words and summarise what I have been up to and what is on my mind.
I have always tried to be honest as a blogger. I know for some people, their blog is their ‘brand’ and they only show the perfect, styled and positive side of their life but I just don’t think real life is like that and without the lows and the tough times, the good ones don’t taste quite so sweet.
I have written about some pretty major events in my life on this blog…my engagement and marriage, friendships, buying a house and holidays but there has been one subject that I have been avoiding and haven’t shared on here, simply because I was not quite sure I would be able to find the right words.
Soon after we got back from our honeymoon in America this summer, my Mum was diagnosed with breast cancer. She had had a routine mammogram just before we went to Vegas and had been called back in for a biopsy where two tiny lumps were detected, both of which turned out to be cancerous.
Now, believe me when I say that there is no harder phone call or conversation to have than the one where your loved one tells you news like this. My whole family reacted differently and you never really know how you are going to feel until it is happening to you.
Once I had gotten over the initial shock, the practical part of me took over. I felt like I needed to know as much as possible to get things straight in my head, even though I didn’t really understand a lot of the medical terminology. Some people hear the word ‘cancer’ and automatically think the worst but I had to focus on what we had to do to get over this. For me, this manifested itself in staying up late reading as much information on websites, blogs and cancer forums as possible and turning up with my mum to her first proper hospital appointment with three full pages of questions I needed answers to – even now, my mum says she feels sorry for the poor doctor!
Things moved pretty quickly after the diagnosis and my mum has had several operations, including a mastectomy, a breast reduction and partial reconstruction.
We found out this week that the next step will be chemotherapy so yesterday I went with my beautiful, brave Mum to have her first of 6 chemo sessions which will take place over the next 18 weeks.
Luckily, the outlook is good and we have been overwhelmed by the love and support of friends and family and, although there are days where we all have our little ‘wobbles’, we are making our way through this together with lots of good humour along the way.
I could write more but I think I will stop there for today, firstly because writing this post has literally taken me days and secondly because Ian is taking me out for dinner tonight to cheer us both up after a difficult week and I have spotted ribs on the menu! xxx